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Unspoken Truths

Updated: Sep 23, 2024


If someone told me when I was a kid that I’d be presenting radio shows, creating and sharing podcasts, interviewing complete strangers, talented musicians, accomplished authors, astounding artists, exceptional creators or that I’d be mentoring classes of eager students on how to find their voices whilst giving them the skills to create compelling content and the likes, I’m almost certain I wouldn’t have believed them. The idea would have felt like an impossible dream come true at the time.


I grew up not understanding the art of conversation, the delicate dance of communication. I would often watch people from afar wondering to myself " What are they talking about?!” I honestly didn’t know and struggled to form thoughts out of the feelings I had and turn them into audible meaning let alone share them.


I held so much in for so long, I ended up with an auto-immune disease called Vitiligo in my mid 30’s which presents as white patches of skin that contain no colour pigment. My white patches trace the line of the lung channel which along with the gut, is a place we hold in emotion. Yep. That was me. The frustration was infuriating, and I was often reactive as a result.

A turning point was during a Counselling & Communications class, part of the 3-year Advanced Diploma of Applied Science/Nutrition I studied fulltime while finishing my DJ stint in Sydney. It was there I learned that the art of conversation and communication comes not by talking, but by listening….


Those who knew me then and know me now may or may not know this about me. It’s easy to hide reality under a blanket of alcohol and personality enhancers, or behind the decks as a DJ with my headphone armor tightly in place, it’s also just as easy to turn down invitations, or leave a place unexpectedly when the uncomfortability of the situation becomes too much. I still do it although not as often but it's still there and I'm friends with it now.


Community Radio has given me the tools and the platform to put many of the monumentally misunderstood moments in my life behind me, the countless debilitating dilemmas where I remained quiet rather than spoke, the physical ache of tightness in my chest I felt when I wanted to say what I needed to but couldn’t. It’s real. Or at least it was.


Its where I’ve found my place in the world, the microphone having this insane ability to reach in and pull my words out of me, allowing them to flow effortlessly, surprisingly, openly. The art of much of this flow is in the scripting and writing which I learned to do from a very early age as an escape mechanism from having to talk!


The reason I’m sharing all of this with you is because you might have something you want to say to the world but don’t know how. You might have stories locked inside of you, or you may be the one to unlock them in other people. This sublime synchronistic exchange is truly a type of healing. Speaking up. Using your voice. Being heard. Sharing stories. Listening.


Lots of people say, “Oh but I hate the sound of my own voice” and i say “It’s not about the sound of your voice, it’s about what you have to say”.


If any of this resonates with you or if you’re just sooper dooper keen to start a podcasts or show, then I offer my 21 years of experience in the various realms of Radio & Podcast creation during my Byron Community College Radio Podcast Basics Course, one of which starts on May 8th and runs for 8 weeks if you are in the Northern Rivers.


I also offer One & Two-Day Workshops & Private Mentoring from Plantation Studios, along with Masterclasses for Festivals and Special Events, and online Radio & Podcast Masterclasses which will point your content compass in the right direction.


I have a crate load of equipment for students to use including the Rodecaster Pro, mics, headphones, and editing facilities available at Plantation Studios in Byron Arts & Industry Estate accompanied by a delightful array of technical abilities enhanced by my life as a vinyl spinning DJ which means I have a mean ear for audio, it’s nuances and subtleties.


Whatever you decide is the best way forward for you, I hope you’ve enjoyed reading a little bit of my story. We are such complex characters, aren’t we? How we present to the world and who we really are can often be two (or more) completely different things. Thankfully my mouth and my mind have reunited after years of separation, but I still have my default moments occasionally!


I’m living proof that even the most troubled of conversational souls can end up carving a clear path through the alphabetic maze of communicative carnage to arrive at a place of peaceful ease.


For more info on the Byron Community College Radio & Podcast Basics Course click here

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Strangely enough I never had a dream of becoming a DJ. I did however have what you might call an epiphany one time in London in 1993, precisely ten years before I first touched the turntables in Sydney in 2003. This epiphany occurred at an after party, a common occurrence once we left The Ministry of Sound, a place that transformed lives and united an era of people who were hooked on the collective love we all felt by being there. We were part of something phenomenal, the birth of house music, love doves and the underground rave scene in the early 90's.  What a combination! Walking into Ministry was like coming home. No longer lost, alone, afraid or isolated, the dancefloor was a seething wave of steamy bodies that engulfed you in its irresistible cloud and took you places you never wanted to come back from. It brought a dance nation together, a generation of ecstasy gobbling, gooning, gorgeous souls who asked nothing of you except to dance. Swept up in the waves of life as I often have been, I was attracted to the crowd that always kept going. There was no stop button, no pause, no rest or sleep, it was one long adventure of music and movement and one of those waves lead me to this specific DJ epiphany. Loading the turntables, lighting, speakers, DJ's, records and bodies into cabs, cars, and onto a few magic carpets, we restarted the party anywhere we could find: An empty house where parents had gone away, old pubs where someone knew the landlord, underground bars that had closed and reopened for us, parks (there was a period of Hyde Park gatherings on Sunday's where masses of us, still dressed in club gear, would set up near the fountains with boom boxes, blankets, frisbees, and free love. Maaaan those were some special times). One day or night, I don't recall, we ended up in a huge house for one such after party. I remember only that it had many floors and a solid plush carpeted staircase that took me down to the basement level where some people had set up a set of turntables in a spare room and were giving it a go. As I stood in the doorway someone called out to me to have a go putting a record on. It had never occurred to me to do so but as I stood in the doorway I heard and felt something remarkably powerful.  I heard clearly the words:  "If I touch the turntables, they'll take over my life"  I froze in limbo for a few moments, as if frozen in time, before deciding all I wanted to do was dance, so took myself back upstairs to rejoin the party. I don't remember anything else about that party before or after that moment in the doorway.  I never thought about it again or pondered the possibility of DJing. I never gave it another thought. Until ten years later in Sydney. Hugos Lounge 2003. I know this date to be exact as I've kept journals my whole life through lack of being able to communicate with the rest of the world. I was working as Host/Reception Manager at Hugos Lounge, from its opening in 2000-2003, my first three years in Sydney. Hugos was an iconic venue in Kings Cross throughout the noughties, appropriate for that time as it was naughty as naughty can be and if you were there, then you know! One of my natural responsibilities was the music and then eventually the DJ's that came to relieve us of the same CDs on repeat, week after week.​ Sneaky Soundsystem were our first resident DJ's and then two very special female DJ's Jackie Shan and Lady Tre came to play. Thursday nights for Tre and Saturday nights for Shan. We fast became family and would talk and play music all night and into the sunrise and back into the sunset. If there was music was playing, we wouldn't go to sleep. Throughout these legendary sessions they both started to say things like "When you start playing...." and I was like.... huh?  Mid 2003 Shan came to the owners with a proposal to have an all-female DJ night at Hugos on Wednesdays called Sista. It was to highlight the incredible talents of the under recognised female talent that was out there playing in the male dominated landscape of DJing. The night started and the first DJ that played was inappropriate for the timeslot. We were a restaurant first, then a bar, and then a cranking nightclub. The music needed to reflect the mood of the Lounge in all its stages, so I shared my thoughts on the style of music to which Shan replied, "Do you want to come and play next week?" ​ I did. ​ I touched the turntables. ​ They took over my life. ​ No one ever taught me how to mix. It just made sense. I never once practiced at home, I borrowed some records for that first gig and remember sitting in the car with a small bag of records on my lap knowing in my heart that someday I would be lugging great cases of vinyl around. To where I didn't yet know but still, I knew. The whirlwind that followed was out of my control. As though someone else had come in and taken over my life. I, as the observer, yet simultaneously in the driving seat of this momentum of music and mixing. It was surreal, sublime, never scary, up there spinning tunes to heaving crowds, something I honestly believe I could never have done had it not started at the Lounge. This was my home. My happy place. Full of friends that were my family. It's where it all began.  From there I was taken on a wild journey that caused me to become adrenally exhausted after realising I had played my heart and soul out in the ensuing 6 years and had nothing left. Empty. Not a single drop of anything left for me. Thats when I left Sydney and moved to Byron. It was 2009. We ALL have gifts inside of us waiting to be discovered. All it takes is the right conditions to allow them to flourish and grow into something you'd never even imagine. I was 33 years old when I first and finally touched those turntables. Who are you and what gifts still lay dormant inside of you I wonder? ​​ These days I play outdoor festivals only. Island Vibe, Earth Freq, Burning Seed. And of course, the Radio. These places and people fuel me and give me back as much as I give out. There are many stories of gigs in exotic, erotic, chaotic locations and more than a few moments of pure joy and connection I could share, but I keep those moments for myself.​ ​ They are the fuel that feeds the flame. ​ Forever burning for the turntables. x​

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